pulse.


"Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world I feel like I can't take it, like my heart is just going to cave in."
-Ricky Fitts, American Beauty

31.5.09

next few

get it over by Alistair Chong

checklist to cross
to dos get lost
calculate my time
there seems a line
its fine between good or bad
don't really care.

30.5.09

universal

another time by Alistair Chong

outside a window
through the grass
the air is alive
in the night
inside outdoors
watching starlight
planet home.

29.5.09

some feeling

greys by Alistair Chong

winter grey
blankets through city haze
brings feet to a sleepy stop
on the roof
the sky she softly moves
listen to me, listen to me
raindrops sing carelessly

28.5.09

back there

wait by Alistair Chong

there are times
you're so behind
wouldn't really think
someone's looking in
but over their shoulder
at the corner of their eyes
you are dancing

27.5.09

different shoes

differ by Alistair Chong

life isn't the same
to every different name
and, through their eyes
is a different shade of sky
footprints break the sand
mosaic of every man
walking through their own world

26.5.09

through mine

just look by Alistair Chong

open your eyes and see
the universe open wide
to make it whatever you want
anything through your eyes
blue drowning through green
red in yellow broken dreams
it's there if you see it


Shoreline by Deas Vail

So you say I'm better off here
As dry as the shoreline
In an ocean of fear

So you say I can't be alive
Until there is nothing
When we're meeting eyes again

Day by day, I wander these halls
And you're casting a shadow
Onto every wall

But all the way you ring in my ear
From the moment I knew you were leaving me here.
You're leaving me here.

This give and take,
This waiting on time
It's this twisted up memory that I can't unwind

These fragile words that fall from my mouth
I'm crumbling and crowded
But I've figured you out
I've figured you out

The shoreline calls the sea
For simple words and company
But words go on and on
'Til they collide and all is gone.

I dive into the deep
Into the sea inside of me
To find another song
To find a place where I belong

25.5.09

wanderer

Space and Lights by Alistair Chong

Stars touch the moon
"Don't stray too far," they say
"I've been out there and it's not the same
Home is where I'm safe.
I belong in this sky
Morning tore me to pieces
I won't leave the night
Never again for me."

Space and lights
I'm wandering in space and light
Way up here
There's no fear
Not anymore

3 a.m. once more
I see the dawn brush the night
"Go home," she'll whisper
"You're safe, it's alright."
Here comes the day
Breaking shadows from before the dawn
From a broken universe
Where light and dark are torn

Day and night
I've wandered through day and night
But I fear
That down here
There's nothing at all

Stars collide and black holes hide
And sometimes all I see are twisted galaxies
Stars collide and black holes hide
And sometimes all I see are twisted galaxies

Space and lights
I'm wandering in space and light
Way up here
There's no fear
Not anymore

24.5.09

ink and blood

more than letter by Alistair Chong

what can words say
nothing else can
where others fail
they eternally stand
more than stars
who fall

23.5.09

confuse

should be by Alistair Chong

between the lines
i'm reading
through the sides
i should be leaving.
but i'm hypnotised
i've memorised
every line
what i can see

22.5.09

up here

through by Alistair Chong

words behind the night
just sounds, only sound
float through every wall
behind my skin
breaks down the doors
and graces in
i'm dizzy
spinning
when i get up again
i'll forget which way
which way is up

21.5.09

chaleur

blanks by Alistair Chong

sleep, take me away
creep inside these tired lines
sleep, forget the day
bring me another pantomime
but don't twist on me
be safe just once

Before It's Too Late by Goo Goo Dolls

I wandered through fiction
To look for the truth
Buried beneath all the lies
And I stood at a distance
T o feel who you are
Hiding myself in your eyes

Hold on before it's too late
We'll run 'til we leave this behind
Don't fall, just be who you are
It's all the we need in our lives

And the risk that might break you
Is the on that would save
A life you don't live is still lost
So stand on the edge with me
Hold back your fear and see
Nothing is real 'til it's gone

Hold on before it's too late
We'll run 'til we leave this behind
Don't fall, just be who you are
It's all the we need in our lives

So live like you mean it
Love 'til you feel it
It's all that we need in our lives
So stand on the edge with me
Hold back your fear and see
Nothing is real 'til it's gone

Hold on before it's too late
We'll run 'til we leave this behind
Don't fall, just be who you are
It's all the we need in our lives

Hold on before it's too late
We'll run 'til we leave this behind
Don't fall, just be who you are
It's all the we need in our lives

It's all that we need in our lives
It's all the I need in my life

20.5.09

helplessness

children by Alistair Chong

reliving days
where i lived in dreams

from the dark

sick through the seams
drifting through space

a doll through force and time
paralysed but feeling

scared beyond anything
helpless


Iris by Goo Goo Dolls

And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
'Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
And you bleed just to know you're alive

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am

19.5.09

i hear

always always by Alistair Chong

in a song
thirty lines give or take
and every word
comes out as fake
in a verse
the words will rhyme
but i hear the same ones
every song, every time
this world is stuck
in the same old rut
and the wheels just turn
and let the lyrics burn
into ash
and worthless remains

18.5.09

in my head

i'm talking by Alistair Chong

give me a change
change these shadows

inside here

below my bed

watching through these eyes

is there something different

Chase This Light by Jimmy Eat World


I'm a suspect, I'm a traitor,
I'm only here in body visiting.
Yellow faces in the distance screams,
"The beauty is in what isn't said,"

I'm rising to my feet,

Because tonight, the world turned in me.
Because right now, I don't dare to breathe.
Oh, babe, I know, it's alive and somewhere for us to find,
Tonight, oh chase this light with me.

My just so, my last call,
My life is yours in your gifted hands.
Confetti rainfall in a quiet street.
These things I've found are special now,
The knot is in my reach,

Because tonight, the world turned in me.
Because right now, I don't dare to breathe.
Oh, babe, I know, it's alive and somewhere for us to find,
Tonight, oh chase this light with me.

A movie, still photograph,
Through a martyr's eyes can I see,
I've seen the best of love, the best of hate, the best reward is earned,
And I've paid for every single word I ever said.

Confetti rainfall in a quiet streets.
The beauty is in what you make it,
So get up on your feet.

Because tonight, the world turned in me,
Because right now, I don't dare to breathe.
Oh, babe, I know, it's alive and somewhere for us to find,
Tonight, oh chase this light with me.
Because tonight, the world turned in me.
Because right now, I don't dare to breathe.
Oh, babe, I know, it's alive and somewhere for us to find,
Tonight, chase this light with me.

17.5.09

above stars

what if the clouds by Alistair Chong

i like the silence
she says
reminds me of times
outside under stars
all i can hear
are cars
reminds me of days
sitting under clouds
head in the haze
in wonder of above

16.5.09

in the rain

loss by Alistair Chong

coming back here again
only to find a different result
the wrong one.
and returning home
in silence
tired
and blank.

15.5.09

could you understand

up there by Alistair Chong

there's something wrong
with up here
too scared to find
some sleep
to meet those again
to see inside
i don't want free reign

14.5.09

they're just living

in my head by Alistair Chong

these messed up dreams
and shadows in the night
creep from behind
to play
these empty streets
i see inside
rear their ugly eyes
and say

he won't live
no he won't
before the clock strikes

13.5.09

for a while

keeping by Alistair Chong

moving up
here come the saves
trying to make the best
of every play
watching, waiting

12.5.09

changes

moments like by Alistair Chong

what can you do
in six days
i don't seem to know
in moments
time can change
from one to another

11.5.09

no highlight

come back another day by Alistair Chong

recurring themes
arise again
empty words
and rhymes so dead
there's no creativity
anywhere
anymore

10.5.09

connected

His family by Alistair Chong

doesn't feel like
it's supposed to be
there's no connection
in this building
hardly anything there

9.5.09

goals

even the most by Alistair Chong

you can win
you can lose
in the end
does it really matter
take it in
you can choose
how it can
take the better
of you

8.5.09

impact

back again by Alistair Chong

something about being here
feels more like home
than around
safe and secure
i can find ground
here.

7.5.09

not notable

justice by Alistair Chong

there's really
nothing in my head
what can i remember
nothing again

6.5.09

matter

subject by Alistair Chong

filler
it's just all filler
these words
taking space away
from you and i

5.5.09

autumn concert

last one by Alistair Chong

well tonight is the big one
too bad that
i have to mess something up
looking back
maybe i should have
done more
but it's done

4.5.09

another one

lead up by Alistair Chong

there's not much
to think
just these nerves
they're fraying
only a little bit
but there's no life or death
in this one.

3.5.09

psychic

do it again by Alistair Chong

it was the name of the game
find the name
inside my head
no way to claim
the shapes i make
and pictures i send
i'm on a crazy train

2.5.09

to sing

here goes camp by Alistair Chong

road rolls behind
road tolls beside
waiting for the sun
to shine
feel the chill
i hardly will
but it's still there
pushing at us

1.5.09

next time they won't

empty hall by Alistair Chong

here goes the last one
before the real
practiced and played
but not complete
needs a little more touch