angel of you

whisper by Alistair Chong

these signs are too confusing
which road am i to take?
my sense of soundness is lost
to the destruction in my wake
these crossroads I've crept upon
are deceptive to my heart
but as soon as I've slept its gone
so right here and now I must take a path

take my hand and lead me
guardian angel
show me who I am to be
guardian angel
won't you piece back the parts
guardian angel
i need you here by my heart
guardian angel

where am i to you?
could you show me just a glimpse
before i lose my view,
my eyes cloud over and the final glimmer slips
calm this storm in my spirit
and keep me from this ravaging decay
take my hope, falling, fearful, and lift it
guardian angel, breathe my name, end this misery, show me the way
oh, guardian angel

take my hand and lead me
guardian angel
show me who I am to be
guardian angel
won't you piece back the parts
guardian angel
i need you here by my heart
guardian angel

when you whisper my name
it is my only hope
your voice, angel of song
but when your name is on my breath
it catches in my throat
breaks my heart, and that light is gone

your name
when i hear it
i close my eyes
and hold back the tears

eye

unveiled by Alistair Chong

Fade to black
I don't want this light
Take it back
It burns too bright
I shut my eyes
And will it all away
Stop this rise
From the depths of haze
I don't want to be seen

claws

blinding by Alistair Chong

I need to get out
From under all of this crawl away
I'm being buried alive
And I need some air, stop this decay
Before I fall to dust
Before I can't turn back
Before I am lost for good
Before I crack

I need to get out
Away from myself
Before my soul goes up in flames
I need to get away
Out from myself
Before I'm lost in this storm of shame

If I could I would
I'd escape from this bastard
But I know I can't
Because this art of hate I've mastered
But I so badly need to go
Be lost to it all
Lose my grip on this life
And let everything fall

I need to get out
Away from myself
Before my soul goes up in flames
I need to get away
Out from myself
Before I'm lost in this storm of shame

scarlet to crimson

rush by Alistair Chong

i crossed the border
the edge of tension
past the breaking point
like the strings on a piano
the hammer falls for the final time
and all hell is let go
and now inside its all unraveling
falling away
lashing out on the inside
blades flashing cut me to parts
before it reaches the outside
i catch my boiling blood
hold it in my hands
and find myself in it
before it overflows
this fire is the only way
or you
but i don't even know
if you do

tight

notes by Alistair Chong

This song

A song so sad
Makes my heart bleed
More than blood
Into sadness it cuts me
Squeezes me tight
Tighter than I'd wish
Wrings the tears from my soul
Each drop a bittersweet blemish
Dripping, falling to the bottom
Tears echo drop after drop
Futile to cease, powerless
Tried and tried, unable to stop
The voice so broken
Taunts my strings
Pulls and tugs, so softly intense
Even before the chorus begins

This song

rest

still now by Alistair Chong

rest your head
lean on me
i'll be your shelter
your strength you need
because when you do
it stills my cry
to know theres one
who feels the same as i
in a well of wailing sadness
lost in waters of shattered glass
we'll hold each other
survive this icy pass
please, don't fall back
because i need one like you
and i am a shell without you
i'm lost,
just a fool

back

one by Alistair Chong

I'm here for you
To pull you out
Of this mess
To lift you again

I'm here
Because I love you
My broken heart shadows
When I see you so

Take my hand
Be my strength
And mine yours
And let's fight the end

It's hard, I know
Oh so hard

no words

here by Alistair Chong

Here we sit
In empty cold
Nothing but space,
our hearts to hold

Here we are
Huddled in the night
Scarred knees to chest
Silence in moonlight

Here we listen
To nothing but our hearts
No words are needed
Just the quiet between us

It's something so special
Because you are

sunday

reaching by Alistair Chong

It's felt for so long
That when I'm weak,
I can't feel your strength
That when I'm poor
Your riches have been spent
That when I'm blind
I reach out, and your hand
Your gentle hand is gone
And I'm left in this storm of sand

How can I right now
Stand in awe
While I drown beneath the surface
Or lift my hands to you
When I'm lost for purpose
And how do I shout your praise
When I'm possessed by raging sea
And how do I abandon my heart
When it feels it already has been?

I've read your promises
And it's my very last hope
Crying out like never before
Just for something.
Just for anything.

held

find by Alistair Chong

This hand I held two moments ago
Slipped into memory
Away in the fog
Lost into eternal haze.

Your fragile hand
Was my strength
And now it's gone
swallowed into the night

Reaching out, I'm futile
I know you're gone
found the other shore
I'm still stuck here
Washed under.

The final drop
of hope in me
Is on the tip of my tongue
Bitter as tears
Sweet like angel's choir
and burns like devil's fire.

Please.
I need you
And you don't know it.
Please.

daylight

back to the sunrise by Alistair Chong

In your embrace I wake
The sun scorns at me as it stirs
The final hours of my day
The fleeting self of me it infers

I find comfort in you
In the final flight
Before the wilting of shaded hues
I'm at home in the night

I find rest in the shadows fleeting
Deepest corners are my shelter
Where my heart and self are meeting
Is in the darkness, the pain of feeling the hurt her

Fight the sun in my eyes its blazing
Prying open my wounds, invading me
Night can't you help me the heat is erasing
The flames lick my heart, won't let me be

All I see is the world on fire
I squeeze my eyes shut
All I see is bloody visions of lost desire
My mind is in thickest flowing flood

Come back
I miss the night
Come back
It's who I am

motion

floating by Alistair Chong

I shut my eyes
Stop the light to my head
Cut the thoughts of myself
And listen instead

The world is passing by
Lost in the motion
Rushing flowing running
Lost in the commotion

Mosaic of sound hits me
Washes me over and away
White noise blacks me out
I dream and drift away

Standing on the bank
I watch as people swim
Take the time to climb out
And I smile.

breathe

passing by Alistair Chong

sit back
and watch from afar
let go
for now

pitch night

all by Alistair Chong

hide, hiding my face
behind the darkness
hide, i'm hiding my eyes
under the shadows
my face sunken in the
long since faded light
don't look here
i give in the fight
let blackness wash me over

one day.
just not now.

Hope Vol. 2 by Apocalyptica

Hope is beauty personified
At her feet the world hypnotized
A million flashes, a million smiles
And on the catwalk she flies in style

But in this heart of darkness
All hope lies lost and torn
All fame like love is fleeting
When there's no hope anymore

Pain and glory hand in hand
A sacrifice the highest price
Like the poison in her arm
Like a whisper she was gone
Like when angels fall

And in this heart of darkness
All hope lies on the floor
All love like fame is fleeting
When there's no hope anymore

Like the poison in her arm
Like a whisper she was gone
Like an angel, angels fall

Like the poison in her arm
Like a whisper she was gone
Like an angel, angels fall

Like the poison in her arm
Like a whisper she was gone
Like an angel, angels fall

words

night talk by Alistair Chong

the words
the thoughts
the sharing
thanks for it

we'll always be brothers
don't ever forget that

slip

far by Alistair Chong

an arm's length away
is an arm's length
but it's an arm's length
an arm's length too long
too far to reach
so close
yet farther then the end of the ocean
an arm's length too far
is an eternity
etter
to never
exist

once

did by Alistair Chong

friends
don't always have friendship
don't always have respect
don't always have faith
don't always trust
don't always

friends
didn't always have to whisper
didn't always cut us down
didn't always stab backs
didn't always bitch
didn't always

why are we?

empty

listen by Alistair Chong

an empty playground
desolate with innocence missing
vacant wind moans the sound
of creaking empty swings

dark side unveiled
fighting stars for the darkness
over them prevails
searching the deepest corners

the empty park filled
childhood spirits have decayed
the blood of pure hands has spilled
ghosts of memories have long since betrayed

in the darkest depths
under blackest shadows
is guilt and stains of death
and the long gone breath of hallows

long gone
long gone

come on

truth by Alistair Chong

don't say you didn't
i know you did
unspoken words
are tangible, unhid
stares me in the face
i thought we'd be straight
but i guess you didn't
want it that way
i still love you
but it's such a let down
to know it
but never to hear it for how
i know it is.

stop covering it up.

again

afraid by Alistair Chong

last night i dreamt a dream
visions of light
breaking the surface to the future
existence so bright

and i'm not afraid
to tell you
it was more than i could imagine
you and i

last night i dreamt a dream
light so blinding
lifted my eyes to heaven radiant
myself i was finding

and i'm not afraid
to tell you
it's more than i could imagine
you and i

kept

stop by Alistair Chong

stopped to take a step
you stall me to now
caught to take a breath
air to me has drowned
locked to shift my gaze
arrested in heaven's chains
my mind in such a haze
all feeling to my heart been slain

when i saw
you in all
all you are to me
everything ceased to be
and it won't start again

my words lost to time
eloquence thrown to the wind
memories ash in your fire
everything is lost, scattering

when i saw
you in all
all you are to me
everything ceased to be
and it won't start again

by

memory by Alistair Chong

children laugh and play
winning love and toys with pride
i hear their joy and play
by the riverside

on the bank, through crowds weaving
off the water wind rises
cool to the touch, relieving
by the riverside

faintly on the wind i hear that song
so familiar, i close my eyes
our song of good times gone
by the riverside

the tune, the words, to me they bring
a smile, warms me inside
softly to myself i sing
by the riverside

i remember what it was like
with you
by the riverside

to care or not

sunlight by Alistair Chong

it's alright
the sun has risen
warm to my eyes
the wind i feel
cool to my skin

it's alright
there are still children here
their playfulness
is music to my ears
rhythmic like the sea

it's alright
you're not here
and you may never be
but the sun has risen

it's alright

here

Jay by Alistair Chong

on a saturday morning
the sun shines through the glass
lightly on my desk it's falling
outside, the world is rushing past

and to the sun
who is the only one
who warms my day

to her i sing

today i want to end it all
i've given up for the while
nothingness of hope is my fall
all i've done has become so futile
i tried, i tried so hard
for it all to turn away
it hurts too much to go on

on a saturday morning
jay sings my comfort, so bittersweet
lost from reach without a warning
flies away, my time with her so fleeting

and to the jay
who was my day
becomes my nightmare

to her i whisper

today i want to end it all
i've given up for the while
nothingness of hope is my fall
all i've done has become so futile
i tried, i tried so hard
for it all to turn away
it hurts too much to go on

in you

steps by Alistair Chong

steps into the night
and they are lost
in themselves

steps into the night
and you are lost
in the others

steps into the night
and i am lost
to you

steps into the night
and we are lost
to eternity

steps into the night
darkness blankets me
and i am lost
into nothing
pleading to no one

get some face

diluted blood by Alistair Chong

whispering, caught on the wind
back turned, i hear it on the tidings
i know, i know i have sinned
but why to others are you confiding

plotting, brooding, blade at the ready
lost in your slander of lust
how could you hold your hand so steady
grasping with betrayal of trust

i thought that by and by
blood of brothers would never dry
i thought that through and through
thick and thin our blood was true
but i can't help but feel so disappointed

words to me are nothing much
but off your tongue curses slipping
virulent, faith corrodes to touch
sucked under in a pool of poison dripping

muttering, mumbling, you so discontent
you attempt to cover your trace
only daring when i've been spent
much too coward to tell me face to face

i thought that by and by
blood of brothers would never dry
i thought that through and through
thick and thin our blood was true
but i can't help but feel so disappointed

real friends don't care
what, who or why i am
i thought we were

i thought that by and by
blood of brothers would never dry
i thought that through and through
thick and thin our blood was true
but i can't help but feel so disappointed

slipping

help by Alistair Chong

empty breath, screaming suffocation
lost for air, fallen through the ice
struggle below surface of rationalisation
gripped, clawed, torn in binding vice

fear haunts me, grips me
fear, blacker than angel's death
fear thrusts me into deranged sanity
fear flings me over the edge

heart blackened, twisted, torn frayed
soul caught my throat to escape
grappling for light betrayed
writhing, thrashing, harmony is raped

fear haunts me, grips me
fear, blacker than angel's death
fear thrusts me into deranged sanity
fear flings me over the edge

sinful nights of demons screaming
taunting, daunting, deformed in sickness
wake is eternal blindness seeming
this dark smothers me in thickness

fear haunts me, grips me
fear, blacker than angel's death
fear thrusts me into deranged sanity
fear flings me over the edge

fear haunts me, grips me
fear, blacker than angel's death
fear thrusts me into deranged sanity
fear flings me over the edge

On my knees
I pray
for God
to touch me

just one touch

talk

Tomorrow by Alistair Chong

Tomorrow.
Will come.
Tomorrow.
The sun will rise.
Tomorrow.
The sky will be.

Tomorrow.
Trees still sway.
Tomorrow.
Waters will flow.
Tomorrow.
World breathes on.

Tomorrow.
The moon will shine.
Tomorrow.
The stars will glow.
Tomorrow.
The sun will fade.

Tomorrow.
We'll talk about it.
Tomorrow.
Tomorrow will end.
Tomorrow.
Never comes.

Any Other World by Mika

In any other world
You could tell the difference
Let it all unfurl
Into broken remnants

Smile like you mean it
And let yourself go

'Cause its all in the hands of a bitter, bitter man
Say goodbye to the world you thought you lived in
Take a bow, play the part of a lonely, lonely heart
Say goodbye to the world you thought you lived in
To the world you thought you lived in

I tried to live alone
But lonely is so lonely alone
So human as I am
I had to give up my defences

So I smiled and tried to mean it
To let myself let go

'Cause its all in the hands of a bitter, bitter man
Say goodbye to the world you thought you lived in
Take a bow, play the part of a lonely, lonely heart
Say goodbye to the world you thought you lived in
To the world you thought you lived in

'Cause its all in the hands of a bitter, bitter man
Say goodbye to the world you thought you lived in
Take a bow, play the part of a lonely, lonely heart
Say goodbye to the world you thought you lived in
To the world you thought you lived in

Say goodbye to the world you thought you lived in
Say goodbye to the world you thought you lived in
Say goodbye

In any other world
You could tell the difference

(Spoken)
I never, ever forget my story.
My face is not sad, but some say I am sad."

i saw

pure by Alistair Chong

most delicate petals
hanging on grace so fragile
raindrops glistening settle
the blossom pure begins to defile

harsh blaze crushes delicate
droplets of poison sweetly sick
carve scars of rust so intricate
flames eat at wilting wick

growth withered beyond allure
starved of life within is lost
crept upon, tainted from cure
fevered past sickest rot

rose slowly decays
most beautiful sight
i have ever beheld

into my eyes

left by Alistair Chong

down the corridor
we're getting nearer
through the crowded floor
haze becoming clearer
closer closer steps they come
space between us narrowing
meters pass by one by one
each one gone the more is harrowing

what happened to us
closest friends we said
till time ceased to pass
we'd be for each other till the end
but it's all gone

see each other face to face
turn from the quickest recognition
risking eyes then averted gaze
ever ignoring staring incision
left to our own devices
all we feel is presence oppressing
to think that another suffices
is fate's architecture repressing

what happened to us
closest friends we said
till time ceased to pass
we'd be for each other till the end
but it's all gone

it will pass

butterfly by Alistair Chong

Butterfly flies alone
Battered by howling gust
Tossed about like a stone
Violently carelessly thrust

Butterfly flies so tired
Tattered by crushing hail
Weaker than past expired
Wings have been ripped so frail

But it's nearly over

Fly, fly with your might
Find your strength to fly on
As the storm rolls through the night
Because it's almost dawn
The sun will pull through
Bring warmth, life and love to you

Butterfly flies so bent
Toward heavens reaching
But spirit is spent
Life the fury leeching

Butterfly wings wilted
Life to death seeming quicker
But under darkness heavy quilted
The faintest hopeful flicker

And it's nearly over

Fly, fly with your might
Find your strength to fly on
As the storm rolls through the night
Because it's almost dawn
The sun will pull through
Bring warmth, life and love to you

Rest and know
There's a tomorrow
The harshest storm has passed